IMPACT Review for 05/11/2017

By Lewis Carlan

The big match hyped for this edition of IMPACT wrestling was the Global Force World Title encounter between champion Magnus and Alberto El Patron. The winner of this match will go on to meet Lashley for the IMPACT World Title. Also hyped was Moose defending the Grand Title against Marshe Rockett, Alisha Edwards vs Angelina Love and the LAX “funeral” for Decay.

The show began with a full recap of last week’s show.

Josh Mathews and Pope are back at it as the announce team

Match 1 – Andrew Everett vs. Caleb Konley vs. Dezmond Xavier vs. Matt Sydal

The match begins with everyone hitting huricanranas on each other, then roll ups as everyone tries to get a quick victory. Caleb Konley and Matt Sydal locked submission moves on Everett and Xavier simultaneously. The action was fast and furious with everyone hitting nice spots as expected.  Xavier hit a superkick on Everett followed by a Konley moonsault for near fall. Xavier and Sydal traded kicks only to have Everett hit a missile dropkick to both. The end sequence came as Konley hit a slap strike and cradle suplex on Sydal for two which was followed by a Xavier splash on Konley for two. Sydal attempts a top corner huricanarana on Xavier but Xavier lands on his feet. Xavier then walks into a Franken Driver by Everett who gets the three count and victory. Everett and Sydal shake hands as Sydal raises Everett’s hand in victory.

This was a terrific opening match with high energy and fast paced action. This match defined what the X Division is all about and what fans can expect moving forward. Was it a spot fest? Absolutely, but a very entertaining spot fest and X Division match. For me the stand out was Dezmond Xavier. This guy has so much potential and can be a major player. I was very pleased to see Andrew Everett get the win here and not Matt Sydal. It opens up the debate on who should be the next challenger for Low Ki’s X Division title. I hope they follow up on this Everett win with a Matt Sydal vs. Andrew Everett match up in a battle of the shooting star splashers.

Josh Mathews did mention that the next set of IMPACT TV Tapings will take place in India. Very happy to see them get out of the IMPACT zone. I am very excited to see TV tapings in front of a non IMPACT zone crowd.

Jeremy Borash is in the crowd behind Mathews again this week and mocking him once again. He held up the P.O.S sign that pointed to Mathews.

Next is an EC3 “earlier today” segment as he cuts a promo on James Storm. He calls Storm a coward and that tonight we will see the cowboy.

KM is back with his bully segments with a pizza delivery guy as his next victim.

These segments are starting to grow on me now. They are actually quite comical with KM bullying these unfortunate victims. KM stating “some people need to learn how to do their damn jobs” is hilarious as the people he encounters are doing their jobs, KM is just preventing them from doing their jobs properly.

Next James Storm’s music hits as EC3 comes out dressed as a cowboy as he is mocking Strom. EC3 gets into the ring and cuts a promo with a southern accent as he says he is paying homage to James Storm. EC3 said he rode up on his steed Sebastian and that his cowboy butt drives the ladies nuts. EC3 then sang a western ballad that was about him ruining Storm’s attempt to become world champion. James Storm hits the ring as they brawl which saw EC3 eventually gain the upper hand. EC3 handcuffed Storm to the ropes, tore off Storm’s shirt, and whipped him unmercifully with his belt. Referees, security, Pat Kelly, and Scott D’Amore all came out to stop EC3. As he was leaving, EC3 tripped over a stagehand and started to whip him with the belt.

That was a very intense segment. Storm’s back was red and purple from the belt lashes. EC3 didn’t hold back at all. This segment put was successful in putting instant nuclear heat on EC3 as we should expect the big payoff match between him and Storm at Slammiversary.

EC3 was hilarious as the crooning cowboy. I love the ballad about costing Storm the IMPACT world title.

Next we get more silly Borash mocking Mathews shenanigans.

Mathews announces a Global Force Tag Team title tournament to crown new champions.

Um, why? The Bollywood Boyz were the last GFW Tag Team champions but the titles were vacated when they signed with the WWE. Why have a tournament now as the GFW is defunct? I figured all the titles would be unified at Slammiversary. It doesn’t make much sense to me.

Match 2: Hakim Zane and Idris Abraham vs. Garza Jr. and Laredo Kid

The match begins with Laredo Kid and Zane squaring off. They both exchanged offensive moves. Garza is in as he hits a dropkick on Zane followed by a few double team moves on Zane. Garza goes for a pin but it’s broken up by Abraham.  After some back and forth action, we get the “wait a second while I tear off my sweatpants” spot by Garza Jr. Zane nailed Garza with a knee as Abraham and Zane take control of the match. Turning the tide, Garza Jr. powerbombs Abraham onto the back of Zane. Laredo Kid hits a 450 splash on Zane and Garza Jr does a dive to the outside on Abraham. Laredo Kid pins Zane and wins the match for his team.

Very good tag team match as Laredo Kid and Garza Jr. continue to shine as one of the top tag teams in IMPACT wrestling. I am glad they are keeping them away from LAX for now as I feel that could be a big money feud.

I was very impressed with the team of Idris Abraham and Hakim Zane. They worked well as a unit and have potential to be a top tag team at IMPACT wrestling.

Mathews confirmed that IMPACT Live will be back and hitting the road in the summer.

We get a recap of Sienna winning the GFW Women’s title last week followed by a backstage promo by Sienna and KM.

Garza Jr and Laredo Kid take their backstage promo turn.

Match 3: Laurel Van Ness (w/Kongo Kong) vs. Ava Storie

Van Ness is still in her jilted bride character and this was basically a squash match for Van Ness. She hit a bulldog, spear, did some ground and pound, then a curb stomp type move for the win. She continued the attack as referee Earl Hebner tried to stop her but Kongo Kong chased Hebner from the ring.

I can’t believe I am going to say this but I loved this match. I was expecting a Van Ness comedy type match perhaps with a Hebner kissing spot but what we got was a vicious Van Ness destroying Storie. I like the vicious jilted bride character as opposed to the comedy side show jilted bride character which is what we have been getting up until this point. If Van Ness continues with the vicious character, I am all in.

Another Rockstar Spud recovery segment aired.

Three words – Spud is Gold.

LAX hit the ring as everyone except Konnan has skull face paint on. Konnan cuts a promo about LAX being the reason that Decay is now dead. He has Santana and Ortiz spill the ashes out of the urns they are holding. Rosemary can be seen watching from the rafters. There was a fan, who was an obvious plant, waving the American flag which pissed off Konnan as he cuts a promo on the American flag saying it means nothing to him. Konnan goes down, shoves fan as Veterans of War music hits. Mayweather and Wilcox come to the ring, brawl with LAX and eventually clean house.

 Very good segment with Decay getting their official write off at IMPACT Wrestling as LAX takes credit for their demise. Rosemary was watching from the rafters in seemingly different face paint so it will be interesting to see what direction she takes.

As soon as that “fan” began waving the American flag, you knew that VOW’s Mayweather and Wilcox were going to be injected into this segment. As predictable as it was, the brawl was good and sets up a new feud between the two teams.

Match 4 – Moose(C) vs. Marshe Rockett for the Grand Championship

The match is being contested under Grand rules.

Round 1 began Rockett taking an early advantage over Moose. Moose tried a gamebreaker but Rockett countered with a dropkick. Rockett hit a boot and crescent kick to Moose.  Moose came back with a dropkick to Rockett while he was on the top of the corner ropes. Moose gained control of the match which led him to win Round 1.

Round two ended quickly with Moose hitting popup powerbomb, running senton, then a big chokeslam to pin Rockett and get the win. After the match, Tyrus appears and gets the attention of Moose as Eli Drake rushes in from behind and attacks Moose. The attack is joined by Chris Adonis who locks on the Master Lock full nelson. Drake hits a few chair shots to Moose.

I liked the match for a few reasons – The first it gave us the first title match in IMPACT for the talented and horribly underused Marshe Rockett. I also liked it as it gave us a clean win in the second round by Moose and not the usual match in which it’s tied 1 round a piece and the third round is the deciding factor. It sets up a new feud for Moose as well against Drake, Adonis, and Tyrus. The three of them make a decent faction.

Quick plug – I will be interviewing Marshe Rockett on May 28th!! Watch for it on Kayfabe Today!

We get more of the Borash/Mathews silliness.

Mackenzie Mitchell is backstage with Dutch Mantell as Mantell announces that next week will be the return of the Ultimate X match which will feature X Division Champion Low Ki, Trevor Lee, and Andrew Everett.

That should be a fun match! I’m glad Sydal is kept out of this match as I’d rather see a Low Ki/Matt Sydal one on one encounter. It would have been awesome if Dezmond Xavier was included though.

Match 5 – Angelina Love (w/Davey Richards) vs. Alisha Edwards (w/Eddie Edwards)

Josh Mathews points out that Eddie Edwards had to get surgery due to Davey Richards attack prior to the match. The match begins with Alisha rushing Love as they roll around trading blows. Love gains the advantage with a clothesline to Edwards. After a few stomps by Love, she misses a knee which leads to an Edwards Future Shock DDT onto Love. Davey Richards tried to interfere but Edwards nails him with a kick and sends him to the floor. Love wraps a steel chain around her hand and hits Edwards with her chain wrapped fist as the referee disqualifies her.  Love continued the steel chain attack on Edwards. A limping Eddie Edwards comes to the ring and stops the attack on his wife. Davey Richards comes in the ring with Edwards crutch and attacks the injured knee of Eddie with it.

Winner – Alisha Edwards by DQ

Not the best match of the night but its main purpose was to keep this major feud going on and getting more heat on Davey Richards as a major heel. The post match attacks were good with Richards going after that injured knee of Edwards.

Backstage Lashley said he will be watching the GFW Title match between Magus and Alberto El Patron and that he himself will be the GFW World Champion soon.

Last week Lashley said he didn’t care about the GFW title but this week he wants to become the GFW World Champion? I guess there won’t be any title unification matches which will leave IMPACT with way too many active titles if that was in fact the case.

Josh Mathews mentions that the GFW title held by Magnus is called the GFW Global Title.

Match 6 – Magnus (C) vs. Alberto El Patron for the Global Force Wrestling Global Title

Match begins with Magnus and El Patron trading blows which sees Magnus win that initial encounter. El Patron came back with a number of clotheslines and then an Enzuigiri in the corner to Magnus. Magnus managed to avoid an El Patron kick and connected with sit out power bomb. Magnus hits the big elbow for a near fall. They go to the outside as El Patron hits a suplex on the ring ramp. Back inside, El Patron hits a backstabber then locks on the cross armbreaker but Magnus is able to get to the ropes for the break. This was followed by more back and forth action between the two. The match ended as El Patron missed a double stomp attempt which was followed by a clothesline then powerbomb by Magnus. Magnus attempts another move but El Patron locks on the cross armbreaker which cause Magnus to tap out.

Winner and New GFW Global Champion – Alberto El Patron

This was a very good match with a great showing by Alberto El Patron. It wasn’t as good as last week’ s Drake/El Patron main event was it was entertaining nonetheless. Also, while El Patron won a world title to close out the show, it didn’t have that “big win” feeling due to the lack of importance the GFW titles have.  

So it looks like El Patron will be meeting Lashley at Slammiversary in a Title vs. Title match.

Final Word – This was another solid edition of IMPACT which has become the norm these days.

I really liked the new team of Idris Abraham and Hakim Zane and despite losing this week, I see them becoming major players in the tag team division given the opportunity.

With the over saturation of titles now in IMPACT with all the GFW gold introduced here’s an idea – How about making the GFW titles #1 contender’s titles? Just a thought as they don’t seem they will be going away any time soon.

Until next time, thanks for reading!

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