Random Rumble – Part 3

The Third and Final Part to the Fantastic Series

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By Liam Byrne @tvtimelimit

Here are the first twenty wrestlers in the Random Rumble following the first two entries:

  1. Jeff Hardy (1)
  2. Vader (30)
  3. Bad News Brown (9)
  4. Rob Van Dam (29)
  5. Hakushi (19)
  6. Tito Santana (11)
  7. Arn Anderson (16)
  8. Mick Foley (7)
  9. The British Bulldog (2)
  10. Bam Bam Bigelow (15)
  11. Booker T (10)
  12. Harley Race (6)
  13. Fit Finlay (14)
  14. Ric Flair (3)
  15. The Rock (24)
  16. Matt Hardy (17)
  17. The Miz (18)
  18. Goldust (8)
  19. Rikishi (20)
  20. Daniel Bryan (21)

Naturally, this is where things get difficult. I have only ten Rumbles left, and only ten actual spots I can choose from. As I get closer to my own number 30 entrant, I will be forced to choose from ever limited resources. Onwards and upwards to entrant number 21.

Royal Rumble 2011 (#24)

The first, and so far only, forty man Royal Rumble, this could open up anyone in 31st to 40th spot – if I was allowing myself to pick from this selection. Keeping with the spirit of this venture, I’m keeping things difficult! Due to this, a lot of the star power is kept until these numbers, so I almost feel a Husky Harris or Vladimir Kozlov pick coming along. However, the face that runs the place saves me as John Cena takes my twenty-first spot having entered this Rumble at twenty-two. This also means me last three picks ran in order of entry (Rikishi at twenty, Bryan at twenty-one and my Cena pick).

Royal Rumble 2015 (#28)

As I flick down the list for this relatively modern Rumble, I notice that Bray Wyatt is sat at number 5, whilst Cesaro is at number 28. Both are guys I would want to include if I had an open choice, so it just depends on who I think will benefit me most in the long run. The position twenty-eight feels like it is one destined for more stars than lowly number five, so Bray Wyatt becomes my twenty-second entrant, with the hope that I can outdo Cesaro for the twenty-eight spot.

Royal Rumble 2004 (#17)

A Rumble that is somewhat overshadowed in history due to the eventual winner. A lot of the potential choices are guys I already have, so I’ve got a fairly free pick in terms of choosing someone for pure enjoyment reasons. Entered at number four, now taking my twenty-third spot, is Tajiri. Green mist all round.

Royal Rumble 2007 (#20)

A Rumble that looks off on paper, especially with Fit Finlay doing the ‘marathon man’ gimmick by lasting over half an hour, I’m most intrigued by the opportunity to try and pick Sabu, but he entered at number seven. Kenny Dykstra at three was another potential option though Flair has his spot, so in the end I settle on adding to the high-flying talents on offer by picking up Super Crazy from number thirteen.

Royal Rumble 2017 (#30)

Now this was always going to be my ace in the hole somewhat. As the roster of wrestlers who will appear in this match hasn’t been fully revealed, I felt it only right to pick any wrestler off of the WWE/NXT roster as a potential legitimate pick. With this, I also allowed myself an opportunity to bolster the star power in the contest if necessary. With a raft of name guys already in, I head to NXT and choose Shinsuke Nakamura as my twenty-fifth pick. As he has no entrance number, I need to randomly wipe out a remaining number – the number chosen by a random number generator is the number twelve.

Royal Rumble 2006 (#19)

For the last five, not only will I make my decision, but I will also mention all the options I had at the tail end of this project. Having saved numbers in the twenties, I hope my plan works to offer me something worthwhile for my final five.

For Rumble 2006, I’m left with Matt Hardy, Shawn Michaels, Viscera, Chris Masters and Shelton Benjamin. With Hardy already firmly booked in the Rumble, the choice is very easy – Shawn Michaels wipes out the twenty-fifth sport in a match where he would end up getting eliminated by Shane McMahon. Lucky him.

Royal Rumble 1999 (#12)

Deep, deep in the Attitude Era for my next choice in the Rumble famously won by Vince McMahon of all people. Somewhat more of an angle than a match at times, my choices are Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Mark Henry, Jeff Jarrett and D-Lo Brown. Now, as much as I want to be looking at the real deal now, I can’t miss an opportunity to put his CEO-ship into the match. HHH’s choice leaves the twenty-third spot out of commission now, so only 26, 27 and 28 are left remaining.

Royal Rumble 2008 (#21)

The spot of an almost superhuman level of recovery in terms of John Cena’s appearance following a torn pectoral muscle seemed to rule him out until Wrestlemania, this ending got a legitimate pop out of me. My choices are less exciting though. Chavo Guerro, Fit Finlay (a choice I have already made) and Elijah Burke of all people are my choices. I didn’t even remember Burke having a run in the WWE, let alone anything he did when he was there. Chalk up a Chavo pick by default. No more number twenty six choices.

Royal Rumble 1993 (#6)

In an absolute dog of a Royal Rumble in terms of name value, my decision to keep the high 20s has lucked out. Yokozuna, the eventual winner, or Owen Hart are the two men that I have the choice between. It is easily the most difficult decision I’ve had to made, but harking back to my youth and legitimate fear the champion sumo wrestler caused in me, I have to go with Yokozuna to take out number twenty-seven.

Royal Rumble 1997 (#10)

So here we are now – the thirtieth entry to my Rumble, and the one where I actually have no say. On the whole, the cards have fallen well though, so I can’t complain too much. I avoid the random AAA entrants used to pad out the numbers, as well as a short appearance by Jerry Lawler. Fake Diesel is also missed narrowly. As I continue to scroll down, I see number twenty eight and … it’s Vader. Blah. Having already picked Vader to enter back at number two, I need to fix this. Using a random number generator, I get two random numbers between thirty – this covers all number twenty eights throughout the history of the Rumble, and all the wrestlers in the 1997 Rumble. I’m left with Randy Orton (all 28s) and The Sultan (from 1997). One last random generator and I am given…The Sultan. Ah well, you can’t have it all.

The final entry list:

  1. Jeff Hardy (1)
  2. Vader (30)
  3. Bad News Brown (9)
  4. Rob Van Dam (29)
  5. Hakushi (19)
  6. Tito Santana (11)
  7. Arn Anderson (16)
  8. Mick Foley (7)
  9. The British Bulldog (2)
  10. Bam Bam Bigelow (15)
  11. Booker T (10)
  12. Harley Race (6)
  13. Fit Finlay (14)
  14. Ric Flair (3)
  15. The Rock (24)
  16. Matt Hardy (17)
  17. The Miz (18)
  18. Rusev (2)
  19. Rikishi (20)
  20. Daniel Bryan (21)
  21. John Cena (22)
  22. Bray Wyatt (5)
  23. Tajiri (4)
  24. Super Crazy (13)
  25. Shinsuke Nakamura (12)
  26. Shawn Michaels (25)
  27. Triple H (23)
  28. Chavo Guerrero (26)
  29. Yokozuna (27)
  30. The Sultan

If anything, all this serves to highlight is the vast array of talent that the WWE has entered into the Royal Rumble over the past thirty years. From all time legends to novelty entertaining acts, the Rumble always offers something for everyone.

As for who I would book to win this thing? … just not the Sultan.

Don’t miss the first two fantastic parts to this series! Part 1   Part 2

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